This is an actual conversation I had in Google Chat today:

S: pharmacists
me: huh?
S: how do you feel about them being called “doctors”
due to the PharmD?
me: I care about this as much as the Pluto planet controversy
S: awesome
so what’s your opinion?
me: in america you are free to call urself whatever you please
see “Dr” dre
see “president” bush
S: lol
thx
i recycled your joke
and gave you no credit
me: khiyana!
(deep betrayal)

I cam across this cool and incredibly frustrating game that I wanted to submit to digg. It’s called Multi-Tasking. But when I tried to submit it to the fine folks at digg I got this message:

This domain has been flagged for non-English content. Currently, we only allow submissions in English. Please refer to our FAQ (digg.com/faq) for more information.

So I had to put the link here and submit this to digg … circuitous I know. Enjoy the game. Also be sure to visit Islamify.com the Muslim Social News Site.

A friend of mine sent me a link about how the gay marriage ban has been overturned in California. He was all upset. Since he was a dude he was able to summarize his feelings with a concise, “This Sucks.”

I, on the other hand replied, “I am saving my outrage for when they allow consensual relationships between older gay men and 11 year old boys.” Can anyone say NAMBLA?

I don’t really know how all this gayness got mainstream. If you’re gay and you want to have a private party with your friends and call yourselves married, be my guest. (That was a figure of speech, you’re not really invited to my place.) This is America and here you can do that. But why are you going to FORCE everyone else to recognize that you are married? This is why I don’t like big government. Groups can hi-jack the state and use it’s coercive powers for their own agendas.  Can you say neo-conservative, nincompoop Bush-hole?

More and more often advertising on the billboards of major highways, on the backs of buses and on store fronts is getting racier and racier. In my part of the world there is a certain ad for a radio station that features three naked women with the radio station’s logo strategically placed to keep it legal.

Needless to say, for the practicing Muslim man the ubiquity of these ads makes it quite challenging to go outside of our homes without surrendering to wandering gazes. So in a moment of genius I fancied a solution.

Particularly egregious public displays of nudity and indecency would be targeted by guerilla graffiti brigades who, upon cover of darkness, would descend on said advertisement and deface pictures of sultry damsels with crude spray painted niqabs (veils).

Mind you I am not encouraging anyone to do this (though it would be very cool and ballsy) and I myself am too scared of the perverted institution of sodomy and racism that is the police to try it myself.

So I retreated to the fantasy lab that is photoshop and had a taste of what that would feel like with these three movie posters. Enjoy them now that they are halal. (Just because these movie posters are now halal, doesn’t mean that the content of these movies are, so don’t get any funny ideas.)

That took much longer that you would think. You know, after all this time spent fiddling with these pictures, I don’t think they look like niqabis so much as they do ninjas. Ninjabis anyone?

“I’m a bum.” That was the answer I gave to someone who asked what I do yesterday. He pressed on asking what I put on my resume. Here was my answer (rant):

“Resume? Resume!? I don’t write resumes! Why should I? ‘Here you go sir, here’s my resume so you can judge and rate me and grade me. Am I acceptable to you? Am I fit to work beneath you and take your orders?’ No, thanks! Dude, I don’t write resumes! Why should I humble and demean myself by submitting myself for approval or rejection like a bad high school essay to be all marked up in red and given an arbitrary grade? Does that make any sense to you? It doesn’t to me.”

That was enough for him drop the subject. Now, I just have to work on making those statements justifiable since I have been sending out quite a few resumes lately and I feel just a little hypocritical. But you know … I don’t care. I enjoyed that rant, it was worth it and I want it to be true. It was nice to pretend for a while.

As an avid web surfer I come across a lot of great pictures of Muslims. After a while I realized that there needs to be a place to collect these images and share them on the web. That’s how ShootMuslims.com was born.

Feel free to visit the site and enjoy the first few submissions. Also, if you have any suggestions of great pics, visit the contact page and submit them.

I was surfing the web again as I am won’t to do and I found this short and interesting description of how Islam came to Korea. Here it is:

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I did a major web surfing session today and while I was on my way I picked up a bunch of quote I thought were cool. Here they are enjoy:

“If voting changed anything they would make it illegal.”

“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” -Ben Franklin

-”I believe there must be one true soul mate for every person.”
-”He must be very busy.”

“For tech support press the exact value of 22 divided by 7.”

“Don’t get all ‘mathy’ on me.”

“From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.”

“Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.”

“She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs”

“If we all did the things we are capable of doing we would astound ourselves.”

“Just out farting around with my camera in China and having some fun.” (farting around?)

“You can fool some of the people all of the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.” — George W. Bush

“Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign policy.” Henry Kissinger, quoted by Bob Woodward in The Final Days, 1976

Here’s my latest article at MuslimMatters.org. It’s more serious fare that you may be used to over here at theManOfFewWords lately. In it I discuss the roots of the gruesome and perverted habits that oppressive occupations breed in their perpetrators. It is of course written in standard ManOfFewWords style so it is as entertaining as it is informative.

Also, if you missed it, you should check out the first post in the series Islamify Inspires over at the Islamify blog.

I also want to take this opportunity to invite any of my readers to suggest topics they might want me to write about.  Feel free to comment and let me know.

Sometime while in class working as a substitute teacher, I have just had enough and so this is how I deal with it. (more…)